This story comes to us from Rebecca Fuson. I've often heard the phrase "your parents take care of you when you are a baby, and when you grow up, you take care of your parents because they turn into a baby". Rebecca, you are truly a wonderful daughter who reversed roles with your parents. Thank you for sharing.
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My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2002. Everything went along pretty smoothly until July, 2007. On the 28th of July, 2007 we found out daddy had stage 4 colon cancer. His first words out of his mouth were, "What's going to happen to mom?" WE assured her that WE would take care of her. I quit my job to stay home and take care of Daddy. Daddy came home from the hospital under hospice care, to mine and he passed away on August 28, 2007. Mom did know what was going on and was pretty much out of it though. My mom had a history of having UTI's that didn't have the typical symptoms. The only symptom she had was a backache. Well, in November, 2007, she had gotten down to about 90lbs, wasn't eating and had a VERY bad UTI. It affected her Alzheimer's horribly! That was the first time she went under hospice care, under the advice of her neurologist, for Failure to Thrive. I was with her 24/7 until Sept '08. Mom was living with my little brother and family. Well, in Sept '08, we put mom in the 1st facility. I felt like someone had taken away my child!! I still didn't work at this time, so I could go and see mom as much as I wanted to. Sometimes I would go during the night, anytime I wanted to see mom, I was there. I made sure I was there for meals so I could feed her. Then, in Dec. '09 I had to start working. So, I got a job where I worked in the evenings, and I still got to spend pretty much as much time with mom as I wanted. I moved to days in January, so my time with mom became limited. The facility started only doing minimal care and I could tell!! I would complain to everyone who would listen. I even had to put perm marker spots on her in hidden locations to make sure she was getting her showers. So, in Sept. '10 I found a much better facility and I had mom moved there. She is under hospice care again, but this time because she's in the end stages of Alzheimer's. When she is up, she sits in a GeriChair, doesn't talk, stares at me or the wall. I still go as much as I can with working, and also in the process of moving. Of course, no-one knows how long the end stages of Alzheimer's can take, so I watch this process also. As for myself, I am having "anticipatory grief" in preparation for mom passing. Having panic times, as well as balling! . But, during taking care of them, especially mom because of the length, our bond has only gotten stronger and closer. Right after daddy passed away, I would sleep with mom in their bed, and as we went to sleep we would hold hands. Mom would say, "I don't think I could do this without you", to which I said to her, "you don't ever have to worry about that cause I'm stuck like glue to you!" I'm so very sad and scared that she somehow knows a little of what is going on and she's scared, and I won't be there when "it's" time. I told her not to go anywhere until I got there. I also told daddy he couldn't have her unless I was there. I hope that they know how very much they meant to me and still mean to me every day!!!
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My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2002. Everything went along pretty smoothly until July, 2007. On the 28th of July, 2007 we found out daddy had stage 4 colon cancer. His first words out of his mouth were, "What's going to happen to mom?" WE assured her that WE would take care of her. I quit my job to stay home and take care of Daddy. Daddy came home from the hospital under hospice care, to mine and he passed away on August 28, 2007. Mom did know what was going on and was pretty much out of it though. My mom had a history of having UTI's that didn't have the typical symptoms. The only symptom she had was a backache. Well, in November, 2007, she had gotten down to about 90lbs, wasn't eating and had a VERY bad UTI. It affected her Alzheimer's horribly! That was the first time she went under hospice care, under the advice of her neurologist, for Failure to Thrive. I was with her 24/7 until Sept '08. Mom was living with my little brother and family. Well, in Sept '08, we put mom in the 1st facility. I felt like someone had taken away my child!! I still didn't work at this time, so I could go and see mom as much as I wanted to. Sometimes I would go during the night, anytime I wanted to see mom, I was there. I made sure I was there for meals so I could feed her. Then, in Dec. '09 I had to start working. So, I got a job where I worked in the evenings, and I still got to spend pretty much as much time with mom as I wanted. I moved to days in January, so my time with mom became limited. The facility started only doing minimal care and I could tell!! I would complain to everyone who would listen. I even had to put perm marker spots on her in hidden locations to make sure she was getting her showers. So, in Sept. '10 I found a much better facility and I had mom moved there. She is under hospice care again, but this time because she's in the end stages of Alzheimer's. When she is up, she sits in a GeriChair, doesn't talk, stares at me or the wall. I still go as much as I can with working, and also in the process of moving. Of course, no-one knows how long the end stages of Alzheimer's can take, so I watch this process also. As for myself, I am having "anticipatory grief" in preparation for mom passing. Having panic times, as well as balling! . But, during taking care of them, especially mom because of the length, our bond has only gotten stronger and closer. Right after daddy passed away, I would sleep with mom in their bed, and as we went to sleep we would hold hands. Mom would say, "I don't think I could do this without you", to which I said to her, "you don't ever have to worry about that cause I'm stuck like glue to you!" I'm so very sad and scared that she somehow knows a little of what is going on and she's scared, and I won't be there when "it's" time. I told her not to go anywhere until I got there. I also told daddy he couldn't have her unless I was there. I hope that they know how very much they meant to me and still mean to me every day!!!
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